Summary of Phase II
Wisdom Horse Coaching Apprenticeship
with Lynn Baskfield and Ann Romberg
Beth Peterson
June 2005
This is a summary of Phase II of a three phase Apprenticeship program with Lynn Baskfield and Ann Romberg, certified Life Coaches and specialists in Equine Guided Education. Both are certified life coaches who have done extensive equine guided education work. They presented at the first annual Equine Guided Education Conference earlier this year. They recently created a new business partnership called “Wisdom Horse Coaching, LLC: Equine Guided Education for Leadership and Life”.
Phase II of my apprenticeship included 1) a coaching intake session, 2) 4 one-on-one equine assisted coaching sessions, 2 each with Ann and Lynn, 3) assisting with the equine part of Lynn’s writing class, and 4) creating a vision collage. Phase II also included taking one of two workshops/trainings recommended by Ann and Lynn. Either an Equine Assisted Growth and Learning Association (EAGALA) Level I training or a Coaches Institute Training. I chose to take the EAGALA training because it involved horses and I wanted to learn more about what EAGALA is about.
Coaching Intake Session with Lynn and Ann, October 2004
Ann and Lynn used three worksheets to guide the coaching intake discussion with me. The worksheets were titled 1) Primary Focus for Coaching, 2) Designing the Coaching Relationship, and 3) Coaching Journal. We completed some more than others. The Primary Focus for Coaching purpose reads, “to help you clarify and document the focus and goals for your coaching. It will help us be clear about what you intend to create in your life during the coaching relationship and to know when we have accomplished what you intend.” Following the directions on the form, I wrote an “intention” statement or commitment for my life or business including a know, feel and do statement. My clarifying direction included this focus:
1. I will know who I’m working with and what organizations.
2. I will have a better understanding of what’s happening between us (humans) and the horse (when doing this work).
a. I will do this through attending the Equine Guided Education Association conference (January 2005)
b. I will be able to articulate it when I see it.
3. I will have more fun and be able to laugh at myself.
a. I will have 2 practices for creating fun in my life.
On further reflection of my focus, I can say that my direction is still working with youth in a more wellness and affirming model. In addition, I have realized I want to work at a teaching institution such as the University of Wisconsin – River Falls where they have an Equine Education program. It would also be possible to work with undergraduates in various disciplines such as education, psychology or even team sports.
While Lynn has assured me I know more than I realize when it comes to identifying what is going on with the horse in a coaching session, I still feel under confident in this area. The next stage of the apprenticeship includes volunteer clients and it is a learn-by-doing process.
The fun aspect still needs “work”. I haven’t taken up a comedy routine, however, I do seem to be laughing more at myself and in general but I’m still far too serious. I need to “lighten up”.
The coaching journal purpose “is for you to document information and ideas you learn about yourself and to write goals and action steps and results achieved during the coaching relationship.” It is divided into 7 sections including: 1) my values, 2) my gifts and talents, 3) my passions, 4) my beliefs and assumptions, 5) my intentions and goals, 6) my accomplishments, and 7) my gratitude list. I completed the section on “my values” and began the section on “my beliefs and assumptions”. For my values in included:
1. Knowing myself. I also wrote down “come up with a symbol”. I think this is about or for my practice.
2. Learning/understanding how things work including sharing what I know, having fun, being social, making things less mysterious and being a vehicle for empowerment in others by providing tools.
3. Having curiosity such as having appreciation and wonder, being interested in diversity and cultural exchange, being kind and fair, having meaning and being practical.
I lumped several under curiosity. I’m not sure why.
For my beliefs and assumptions, the only thing I wrote down was “things have to be practical.” I’m not certain I agree with this assumption at this point. I think that’s more my “inner critic” speaking. I believe things need to be full of wonder and mystery. Then they are interesting. Then it becomes more intriguing to figure things out, or not.
There is much I did not complete on the coaching journal handout. Maybe it was just a starting point. I have completed parts of it in my journal such as weekly accomplishments and a gratitude list.
I believe I have come up with an idea for a symbol. I’ve seen it in sculpture form: a horse head and front hooves with a dolphin hind section. This includes my love of and appreciation for the horse and the water and swimming.
Being curious seems to be coming up more in my life and I am very grateful for that. I am also beginning to see how I can be a vessel for passing on “full body/mind/soul living tools” with the help of horses.
In looking at the “Designing the Coaching Relationship” form, I have arrows pointing to 4 of the 9 topics. The purpose of this form reads: “Together we create a relationship that supports you in creating the life you want. For each of the topics below, we will discover how you handle these things in your life, and how you want me, as your coach, to work with you when these situations arise during the coaching process.” The topics include: 1) magnificence, 2) recognize/appreciate, 3) feeling good/accomplishment, 4) avoid/resist/escape, 5) tolerating, 6) angry, 7) hard on self/judgment, 8) games/hard truth and, 9) accountability/reliability. I have arrows pointing at magnificence, recognize/appreciation, avoid/resist/escape and angry. I believe magnificence goes along with recognize and appreciation, to some degree. I have been working on recognizing and appreciating myself and as hard as it is to write, my magnificence. What is it that I do that is special and unique and in some cases magnificent? I have come to recognize and acknowledge these things for myself and in myself. Through my swimming instruction, my council and care giving as a parent and spouse, my burning interest in helping youth be authentic with the help of horses. At the same time, there are things I avoid or resist or try to escape and interestingly enough this quite often can make me angry, the last item I highlighted. It is much better to recognize all things and deal with them than to try and hide from them. This, too, is something I am working on. And part of this is to forgive myself and realize others are forgiving, too.
The other focus I took away from the “coaching intake” session is to focus on curiosity. I seem to be curious about a lot of things. Ann and Lynn asked the question, “How will I bring it into my life this week?” It is interesting that curiosity was something I chose to focus on. Curiosity and fun go together. I recall last summer how a horse showed my how to have fun and be curious at one of the workshops hosted by EAL MN (Equine Assisted Learning Minnesota) at an arena just outside of Hudson, Wisconsin for business leaders and entrepreneurs. The horse literally started snooping inside garbage cans, knocked over a few empty chairs, and went right up to an individual and smelled their head. In answer to the question, how will I bring curiosity into my life this week, I don’t know what I did or am doing but I believe I’m paying attention to what peaks my interest, what I want to know more about, or experience or try just for the sake of trying it, not knowing where it will go. Being curious is part of being alive. I am becoming more curious. I am becoming more alive!
Equine Assisted Coaching with Lynn, January and February 2005
In going out to the pasture on a January morning, two black horses came up to Lynn and me. One seemed friendly enough and looked up at me. But the other one, looked up came over and started to check me out by sniffing me. This horse was curious if not assertive. I recall saying I liked this horse. She asked, “What is it you like about it? What does being curious mean to you? Why didn’t you choose to work with the other horse?” We had a discussion about where curiosity can lead. I ended working with Bonnie, the curious and assertive black horse. Lynn and Bonnie helped me untangle the issue of whether or not to pursue buying my parents farm. While I was making it seem like an impossible task due to all of the emotional attachment to the land and the lake and the probability of bidding against my siblings in a land auction, Bonnie showed me how when your intent is clear you simply move forward toward the goal. After that session I asked Lynn whether or not Bonnie was available to lease. It turned out she was not but another horse, Dallas, was available to ride as the owner is currently not able to spend time with her due to a family illness. I also pursued riding lessons to refamiliarize myself with what I knew at one time and also with new things.
My second session with Lynn involved working with Dallas. Now Dallas is difficult to catch due to her past history as a trail horse, I seem to remember. Lynn asked about my focus with St. Mary’s and whether or not on was still “on track”. This contract has been particularly fulfilling with all of the independent study I am doing and getting closer to horses in one-on-one work. I feel like I am on track.
As we went to find Dallas in the herd, Lynn asked if I had found my herd yet. I feel as if the folks involved with the Equine Guided Education Association are part of my herd. They are some of the most caring, dedicated, compassionate, centered folks I have met. Lynn asked on the hilltop what it symbolized or meant to me. I responded “That a contentment or belonging came to mind as I looked down at the herd; being a part of something greater than the sum of its parts.
We finally found Dallas back in the pole shed out of the wind but still in the sun with a few other horses. Also sunning herself was a big, fluffy white and golden haired cat. Now I really wanted to pet this cat and pick it up and hold it close to my cheek like I did so many times in my childhood when I went out to the barn to be with the animals. Instead, I focused on what I thought I “should” do, halter Dallas, and she promptly walked away. I tried again to halter Dallas and she bolted again. Finally I decided to follow my instinct and I went to pet the cat in the sun. She was incredibly soft. Dallas came back in the pole barn. I put my hand on her and she went to the left, then to the right but did not bolt. I was about to halter her when I saw that the halter was still buckled. As soon as I saw it, I was mad at myself for not noticing this sooner. As I started to unbuckle it, Dallas walked away. Then another horse came over to me while I was talking to Lynn and actually put her muzzle on the halter.
Lynn encouraged me to feel the innocent curiosity and go with it. That it “keeps the eyes soft” (like a horse’s vision) rather than focusing so hard on the task. She also commented on the importance of the self-care Dallas was doing by sunning herself in a sheltered area with a few members of the herd. SMART horse!
Equine Assisted Coaching Sessions with Ann, April and June 2005
My sessions with Ann revolved around forgiveness and boundaries. In the first session with Ann the horses were eating hay. I was upset over a discussion I had with Pat, my husband, the night before about whether or not to pursue purchasing my parents farm. I kept pushing him on it and he made a sarcastic, hurtful statement. The day I was to meet Ann I drove to Forest Lake thinking the session would be at the stable where I had worked with Ann cleaning stalls and bringing in horses the previous summer. Instead, I needed to be at a stable near Stillwater. So guilt, shame, hurt, anger: all of those emotions were present when I finally arrived. What happened with the horses as we began the session was quite amazing. They each began to lie down under the awning but still in the sun. These smart horses who are so relaxed! Legs stretched out, head lying on the ground. My notes in my journal read:
…The one we were closest to wanted to lay his head back and down and stretch out his legs, to not hold up his head. Before he did that I wanted to give him a hug to be in an embrace where time is suspended and there are no worries. As I stepped forward because I really wanted to touch him, he put out his mouth as if to bite me but he didn’t. He was telling me to keep away. I was invading his space and needed to stay back.
I realized I had been in this situation before both literally and metaphorically. That when I was a child, I went to the horses for solace and love. And they gave it to me. They did; over and over and over again. I realized as I was standing by this horse, Digsby, I think he was, about to approach, I had done this so many times before when the horses at home invited me into their space and I felt whole and safe and timeless and loved and accepted and like I didn’t have to think. I just was. I believe this is something I yearn for to have again.
The metaphoric thing this experience with Digsby brought up is my relationship with Pat and how I push and push and push and I do not always respect his boundaries or his subtle warnings and it is often with sarcasm or walking away that I feel bad. Only later do I realize I have pushed too far. I am a pushy person. I see possibility always. Pat is a one-step-at-a-time kind of guy.
For the second session, I arrived in a funk as well. First there was the shame and guilt I felt for missing a session with Ann back in March followed by the embarrassment of driving to Forest Lake for the first session only to find out I needed to drive to Stillwater. And finally, the shame, embarrassment and guilt I felt for not making sure I had the directions to the stable and getting lost and being late for my second session with Ann. The cat Ann came to call “Forgiveness” and Lucy, the happy-go-lucky dog, joined us in the pasture with the three horses, too.
Ann had me notice where I felt all of this in my body and to describe what it looked like. She encouraged me to stay with it and to ask it what message it had for me. The message was to forgive myself and to know that I am great! Then she had me bring my hands to my heart and throat (where I was feeling all of the guilt, shame, and anger) and to hold the ugly, round, bumpy pink/grey ball representing these feelings and to thank it for its message. It grew smaller. “Forgiveness” was sitting on my foot by now. My journal notes read:
…Later, Ann asked me to go over to Digsby, actually she said “one of the horses”. I had the halter rope. Digsby had a halter on and was closest and seemed most willing so I went over to him and put the halter rope on his halter. Ann asked me to take Digsby on a walk and describe what forgiveness looked like for me. When I was more generic in describing the problem, she asked me to take Digsby to the tree and describe, more specifically, what forgiveness looked like. What happened was I went into a non-thinking mode where I was “just with Digsby and being me” without any judgment. I was just enjoying listening to him chew the grass, watching him find the grass he wanted and step in that direction, enjoying being outside and not thinking about anything but being there. And I told Ann this is what the horses did for me when I was growing up. They helped me to be present and to stop thinking so much and to be content. Ann offered that it sounded like I was “meditating with the horses.”
Ann also said this may come up in a client situation, where I am hard on myself. So how will I let the horse help me? She said she has done a lot of work with her inner critic. It is important to look at the information that is there, thank it, and let it go. Not to examine it quite so much – that one can get mired down and “go into circles” and be stuck.
Ann commended me for the authenticity I bring to the sessions. And to see how far I have come in forgiving myself more easily. We talked about “for the sake of what” am I doing this work. I brought up authenticity and better functioning immune system and mental health correlation. It is the direction my next contract or the last contract ought to go, in part.
Assisting with Lynn’s “Writing the Wind” writing course equine session
Two of the six sessions for Lynn’s writing class were held out at the arena in Prior Lake where Lynn keeps her horse, the Baroness, and where she does her equine assisted coaching work. Using an intuitive process, Lynn selected five horses for us to work with for the first session out at the arena. Lynn, Ann and I brought the horses in to stalls where we fed and groomed them. We set up the arena with portable rails to create a large area for the horses to be in with a smaller corner area where the class would observe the horses interact. Lynn asked me to gather wood and build a fire in the sand near the arena.
After Lynn oriented the class to the outline for the evening while sitting around the fire, Ann and I brought the horses to the arena and we all observed the interaction between them. The horses took on different relationships with each other as a group of five separated from the herd of fifty. Later we stood by the horse that we identified with, if we did, and explained why. Eventually we wrote about this and shared it with the group. At the end of the class, Ann and I led the horses back to the barnyard, one or two at a time, giving them each a cob of corn before turning them out.
For the second session, we brought out three horses to the arena and created a small pen of sorts in the corner of the arena. Again, Lynn chose the horses using an intuitive process (that I would like to learn more about). After working in pairs to declare our commitment to ourselves and to living, class participants did some breathing and grounding exercises. One by one we went into the round pen with one of the horses to speak our declaration to the horse and the group and, without any ropes or halters, tried to get the horse to move in a circle. Using the energy of our commitment from our body the horse either will or will not move. All of the horse’s actions give information or feedback to us. With the observations and questions from Lynn and Ann, the discussion gets very deep and soulful. I believe I used the words “prayerful” when describing it in my writing after the experience. Ann was working with Lynn to assess and process the round pen work with each person. I was holding one of the horses in the arena while it was eating hay during the round pen work. I, too, experienced the round pen work as a member of the class.
Lynn was having us work with the horses to help each of us find our writing voice. The horses help give feedback, both literal and metaphorical, to the energy of our inner being and the emotions that come up. It was an extremely fulfilling experience to be in this writing course with these women and to work with the horses. It seemed so simple, what we did with the horses, yet so powerful. I described it in my journal as “profound”. They simply help us to be more human.
At the end of the session with the horses, we sat on the chairs around the fire I had built. Lynn and Ann led the discussion on what came up for us and how we felt after experiencing the round pen work with the horses. Words people used to describe how they were doing after the round pen work included: whole, enlightened, connected, “shook up”, and joy.
All of my experiences in this apprenticeship have launched me into seeing myself doing this work (though still with some guidance). I am grateful to be on this path with these people and these horses.
